Ex- traveler

So today I was a “casual traveler” I mean talk about labels- I don’t mean like at the cabin this weekend or stereotypes or any of that crap- I am talking about how now at the airport there are three lines- “family”, “causual” and “expert traveler” – the family one is pretty clear cut- but the expert and casual- what exactly does that mean- by putting expert it automatically designated casual as retarded traveler. Which apparently today by sheer chance I was. But honestly who is going to consciously choose retarded traveler over expert. But where is the line? Who determines who is an “expert” at getting on a freaking plane- I mean is there like a minium flight requirement or do you need one of those fancy rolly “I think I am making the most efficient use of carry on” rolly bags? And do think that if I snuck over with my hippi canvas bag and sweaty grey t-shirt the security guard would come after me with her cloth badge? I found myself being critical of those in the line superior to me- it was like seeing an old Geo in the fast lane, or someone with 18 items in the 12 item express lane at the supermarket. And for that matter- do the expert travelers get priority- is there lane shorter- the answer is yes. It is. Let it be known always randomly choose the line to the left. You might end up an expert. To the left- Cause you know you ain’t right!!